ic contact - mask or menace

[wonk]

hi its roxy
leave a message and ill get back 2

Comments

text; 4am on the 24th.

[nitidus]

It occurs to me that I have been keeping a secret from you, possibly because I am greedy and have hoarding issues. Also, I am very attached to it and love it like my very own child.

I have your cat, from your time in the City. Obviously, you don't remember having a cat but -- well. I have it, if you'd like to get acquainted.

4:07 AM because cats are worth waking up this early for

[wonk]

omg whats his name

or her

also im glad youve been taking care of ur sibling rose

[nitidus]

Gintendo. He is Newt's favourite cat, I think.

[wonk]

omg? omg

who named him i need 2 find this person immediately and thank them 4 such a brilliant contribution

also i guess im gonna have 2 let newt visit

he better be treating gintendo right

[nitidus]

You did, actually. :)

He is, don't worry. I think he has secretly adopted him.

[wonk]

does this mean i have 2 get married to newt

is that what has 2 happen 4 gintendo to have a stable family life

[nitidus]

I think you'd have to buy him dinner first.

[wonk]

rec me a place and i will take him there 2 discuss these important family matters

text.

[glowsferatu]

so i hadnt bothered asking before
but it might be time for us to discuss timelines

[wonk]

5 months ago id be sayin i wasnt drunk enough for this

where do u want me 2 start

[glowsferatu]

well since its a question i only now know to ask
which timeline are you from
unless its another thats totally unrelated to the two im now aware of

[wonk]

both sort of

me+john left our original one to go to karkats and probs daves too i think?

but i got zapped here in between

[glowsferatu]

so what i gather is that things became so terrible on our timeline that john somehow developed time travel abilities and altered events to create karkat and daves
but all i know beyond that is i apparently killed gamzee

tell me what happened

[wonk]

when you guys got to our session condy took control of jade and jane and captured me + jake

they separated u guys out among the different planets

john got retcon powers from some artifact in the furthest ring which lets him change time w out creatin doomed timelines

he zapped in and we traded stories

meanwhile this one bitch in a spiderdress used her powers 2 fuck with jakes head and made his hope powers go insane

jade tried to switch lofaf and derse so he wouldnt cause too much damage but he still permakilled her

jane killed him temporarily

you trolls all got back together and gamzee and terezi started fighting

he was beating the shit out of her

then condy shows up

you and karkat tried 2 kill gamzee but karkat got tossed into lava before u could chop him in half

u killed gamzee right before condy killed you with eyebeams and stabbed rose

i snatched her out while the spiderbitch permakilled jake and jane

rose

rose died anyway

terezi came and found us w her dragon jet pack and yelled at us not 2 give up

then she laid out her plan and probs died like right after she was fucked up

i went to talk to my denizen nix

she said to go hang out on johns planet so i did that right before he zapped it out to some kinda extracanonical nothingness

he went off to fix the timeline and i got sent here

thats my whole story

[glowsferatu]

[ the condesce kills her with eyebeams. okay. that's something. but jade dies under another's control, karkat is killed by the same troll he tried to save, and rose...

this shouldn't happen. she can accept her existence leading to a dead end as long as this can't happen, even if she's always had a feeling that she's older now than she'd ever survive to be elsewhere. their timeline should have been doomed, if this is what it comes to. ]

thank you roxy

[wonk]

lmao idk what for

but ur welcome i guess

dont suppose you got any advice 4 shit to do when youre fucked up and cant drink to forget anymore

text.

[nitidus]

Slightly odd question, but would you like to come stay with me for a few days?

The last two of my remaining house mates have left, seemingly on an indefinite basis. I promise there is no residual boy stink, I have been cleaning thoroughly.

[wonk]

yeah absolutely

actually i could stay as long as u want tbh theres nothing keeping me @ this house

[nitidus]

Dave is moving in permenantly, so you of course are welcome to join us. Permenantly.

[wonk]

DERSEHAUS HERE I COME

now i can spend all my time w/ my sons and daughter

[nitidus]

I'm going to have to invest in a larger trash can, I think. To house all the future pizza boxes.

[wonk]

can u not cook

[nitidus]

Things I can "cook":

- boiled eggs
- fried eggs (sometimes; requires more practice)
- toast
- once, a very nice omelette with bacon
- chicken
- broccoli

[performance]

[ As requested and discussed at great length, the dream of the 90s is alive on the lawn of Heropa #1. Check out these totally wicked skeletons, bro. Radical. Tubular. Awesome. ]

12/25

[glowsferatu]

[ When Roxy wakes up, she'll find three boxes on the kitchen counter. One of them is addressed to her.

Inside, a she'll find a set of Necomimi ears. Because if there's one gift that will never be less Roxy to Kanaya, it's robot cat ears that wiggle according to her thoughts. ]